Oratio- Needing to pray

It's after 2:00 and my desk looks like a bomb hit it. That scattered, behind the 8-ball feeling hasn't gone away. I am eating an apple. I am thinking about Oratio...time to pray.  I'm writing this blog instead of working because it is how I will give myself permission to pray, be productive and eat my apple all at the same time.

I'm beginning to see a pattern, here. I let myself get buried under a thousand To-Do's, then I get stressed, then I need to eat to calm down. It is not eating for nourishment. It is not eating as a prayer. It is not eating to honor my body. It is eating frantic, in a rush and in between the more important things to do. So if this is how I eat, how do I pray? Do I pray in a frantic rush and in between more important things. I could say I don't but what about "pray without ceasing." I certainly do cease. I live my life and then pray....when Lectio Divina is asking me to live my life as a prayer, feasting on the word, dwelling in God. Easy to say. Harder to do.

  So, I'm going to take the next 3 minutes to pray. I'm going to pray about finishing my apple and then. I'm going to pray about my desk.  Be right back.

OK, I'm back. I didn't get to the desk. I got lost in my prayer about the apple. As I ate the apple, I gave thanks for the apple. I concentrated on the taste of the apple and the feel of the apple in my hand and on my tongue and as I chewed it. I ate each bite slowly. I ate each bite prayerfully. I came to the core and saw a seed.

Tears came.

Everything that grows has a seed, the small thing that has the potential to be the greater thing. My verse implies that I am God seed.  Then why do I feel so UN-Godly most of the time? How would God live as me?  Maybe by not moving so fast. Maybe by concentrating on one thing at a time.

Before 10:00 LECTIO- Think about this week's Beatitude, my own version of it, that speaks to me. Use eating and drinking as prompt.
10:00-2:00- MEDITATIO- Late morning snack and Lunch time. Think about My verse. Chew on it before starting lunch.

2:00-6:00- ORATIO-  Late afternoon snack. Pray in appreciation for the thing I'm doing right now. Ask for an awareness of God. Be kind to myself for not being perfect. God loves me.

MY ORATIO- Bring an awareness of God to eating an apple. Done
Bring an awareness of God to clearing my desk. I'll try.