Week 3 Day 5 It's about Time

Dr. Phil once recounted a story in which Oprah urgently summoned him to meet with her and “her girls.”  Oprah sent her private jet to get him and a few hours later, Dr. Phil was in Oprah’s living room to answer the urgent question.  As recounted in the book, “The Time Paradox,” the dialogue went something like this:

Oprah: Dr. Phil, we need you to tell us why we’re fat.

Dr Phil: You interrupted my dinner with my family and flew me hundreds of miles to ask me that?

Oprah: Yes, it troubles us deeply.

Dr. Phil: Hmm, I see. Well, there’s a quick answer. I can probably make it home for dessert. You’re fat because you want to be.

The Girls: We’ve been talking about it all weekend and we can’t figure it out ourselves. So, we really need you to tell us.

Dr. Phil: Oh, so you want the honest answer?

The Girls: Yes, we are ready for it.

Dr. Phil: Okay, you’re fat because you want to be.

Oprah: No really, You can tell us. We can take it.

Dr. Phil: Oh now I see. You want the whole truth…Okay, you’re fat because you want to be.

In the book, Drs. Philip Zimbardo and John Boyd point out that there are two languages being spoken in the dialogue above. The languages are the different Time Orientations.

Dr. Phil comes from a Future-Oriented perspective in which what is most salient, when Oprah is deciding to eat the doughnut, is whether it is good for her in the long run. Dr. Phil wants Oprah to see that she should be thinking about the future consequences of her actions at the moment of decision. By not doing so, Oprah is "choosing" to be fat. Future Oriented people are cognizant of the consequences of their decisions. In fact, the future goal is more important to them since present actions, in their view, are always influencing the future in some way.

Oprah and “her girls” come from a Present-Oriented perspective where the choice is not to be thin or fat but to enjoy the moment of eating. The most salient thought is “the doughnut tastes good right now.” Present-Oriented people focus on the experience, the thoughts, sensations, pains and pleasures of the present moment. The problem is that the constant attention to the taste-good-in-the-moment food and little attention to what-is-the-cumulative-effect-of-these-extra calories?” has the unintended but predictable consequences of weight gain. So in the conversation above, both parties were actually talking in their language of time.

In the book, Zimbardo and Boyd report the result of 30 years of scholarship on psychological time. Unlike clock time, psychological time varies according to culture, person and situation. Furthermore, the authors believe that one’s attitude toward time is “largely learned, and that you generally relate to time in an unconscious, subjective manner.”  According to Zimbardo and Boyd, achievement requires a future orientation but future-oriented people run the risk of achieving for achieving sake and not really enjoying life. On the other hand, present oriented people do take the time “to smell the roses.” However, they are less likely to eat well or exercise as preventive health measures.

What is most helpful is to have some of both: to realize that the current actions DO have future consequences and at the same time enjoy the life that you are living right now. 

Sacred and Fit is about bringing mindfulness to eating in the present but the reason to be mindful is to change future health outcomes. So, while healthy eating may be about time, it is also about balance.

As we’ve said before, Health is not the absence of disease but the presence of wholeness and balance.

[You can take the short test to learn your time orientation and get tips on how to incorporate different time orientations into your life at www.timeparadox.com]