Slow miracles are just as miraculous

This week begins the second phase of my brother's (and our family's)  journey with cancer treatment. It is a journey that many families take. And many of you have probably experienced the trauma of it. First the initial diagnosis hits you like a fast moving train.  Then you give up normal life and enter the new life of experiences NOT of your own choosing. Your days are regulated by hospitals/doctor's visit/various appointments, and your nights, filled with uncertainty, or worse; pain, discomfort and uncertainty. 

As you may recall, my brother was initially given 6 months to live. Last January, he was told that 95% of people with his diagnosis don't survive and that only 5% are eligible for surgery. Well, now, 9 months later, he begins the preparation for surgery in November.

  While, my brother is very thankful for this new treatment plan, his preference, of course, was to be healed suddenly and miraculously. He is a devout Christian. He has many people praying for him and last summer was prayed for by the pastor of a huge church where other people had experienced miraculous healings. As one who has experienced a miraculous healing of a fractured vertebrae, I have no doubt that things like this happen. However, I have had much more often witnessed slow miracles, that happen over a period of time. I see my brother's progression out of the 95% and into the 5% as nothing short of a miracle.

Even though his miracle consisted of radiation and chemo, it has given him time to reconnect with his daughters and to become more thankful for each day of life. His faith has deepened. He has grown closer to God. These are all miracles.

It is easy to forget miracles like this when we are all in our busy normal lives. In fact, our busy normal lives sometimes prevent us from slowing down long enough to even notice miracles.  So, I committed to doing something about that.

This semester I committed to reminding myself and my students to just slow down. I now begin each class with 3 minutes of stillness. I began the semester by asking students to distinguish stillness from silence. They agreed that one can be silent (not talking) but still have a mind furiously working.  I then showed them some of the many research studies that show how a mindfulness practice that slows and eventually quiets the mind has also been associated with numerous health benefits in sick people, less violence among incarcerated people and improved grades with students.  The last one got their attention!

As the semester has progressed with numerous interruptions caused by moving into a new building during the third week of classes and having the second week canceled altogether because of Hurricane Irene, I've noticed that things seem to be flowing much easier. The students seem much calmer...but maybe this is my imagination...I'll report what happens after the first test. However, I am not imagining the calmness that I feel during those first three minutes. It is then that I reconnect with my desire to be a contribution to their lives and realize the utter privilege of being a teacher and how fortunate I am to have a job that I love. Perhaps starting each class with these type of thoughts will make a way for the miraculous to show up. If so, I plan to be aware of them when they do.

First the Earthquake then Irene...

Last Thursday afternoon, the ground shook under my feet while I was walking to class. The strange thing was that I didn't even notice it. What I did notice were the people that started pouring out of class room buildings. Students and professors were milling around wondering what to do. An earthquake, the first one in 70 years, had just shaken us all out of a normal day. The epicenter was was in a little town west of Richmond but the effects were felt for hundreds of miles. Even though there was no wide spread death and destruction, the earthquake did serve as a reminder that bad stuff happens (which I knew) and bad stuff can happen to me (which  don't like to think about).

So, for a moment, I was faced with the thought of being in a building that is shaking. I was surrounded by people who couldn't stop talking about the windows rattling and the floor moving--I walked away quickly to put their tales out of mind. After all, the shaking had only lasted for 45 seconds and nobody on campus was hurt. But then the very next day CNN started gearing me up for Hurricane Irene. The issue here was that since we own a  home in a beachfront community and the hurricane was fast approaching the coast of North Carolina there was a real chance that our house could be flooded or worse, blown away. -Bad stuff happens and bad stuff could happen to me.

As it happened, Irene chose to come ashore about sixty miles north of our little town of Kure Beach. There were over 1100 homes destroyed or severely damaged along the Outer Banks of North Carolina, the cost of clean up and restoring roads and bridges is likely to be over 70 million dollars. As I read these statistics, I was so thankful that Irene chose another path. But that didn't feel right. I am thankful that I dodged the bullet that hit a thousand other people. Where is the compassion in that??!!!!

So, now I'm grappling with--how to live by faith and at the same time realize that bad stuff does happen.  Despite what I tell myself on a regular basis, I know that even with regular exercise and eating right people still get heart disease and cancer. Even good God-fearing believers can get struck by lightening or get hit by a car.  Bad stuff still happens and can happen to me.

So why go through the trouble of trying to live a disciplined life or a spirt-led life or even a moral life when hurricanes and earthquakes happen  along with diseases and accidents. Well, my answer is that the practice of disciplining my behavior helps me in disciplining my mind. Having a disciplined mind, in my view, is the most important thing because when bad things happen I will always have a choice about how to react to them. I don't have to join the throngs of people fearful about the economy or afraid of the next hurricane (Katia is now forming off the west coast of Africa) or terrified of loosing my home.

The ability to cultivate a peaceful mind even in the face of a catastrophe or in the midst of a disaster is what I believe is the highest form of faith and devotion and it requires practice. So, while my green smoothie*, may not look like the most appetizing breakfast, in addition to great nutrition, it is also helping me prepare for hurricane season.



*For more information on green smoothies- see "Sites we like" at this blog OR check out my favorite recipes at the S&F website.